Have you seen the metablogging wind-up toys? They’re fun! You wind them up and turn them loose, and they all walk around, bumping into each other, saying things like “10 Ways to Get More Traffic!”, and “10 Ways to Make Money Online Without Really Working.” They say other things, too, like: “Nice Post! I didn’t really read it, but you should check out my unrelated blog!”
Bouncing ‘Round the Echo Chamber
Why am I saying this? Am I just a jerk who hates metabloggers? Certainly not! I love metabloggers. But I’m just weird that way. I’m a metablogger’s metablogger. As a blog consultant, I can just as easily help other metabloggers as I can bloggers of any niche.
You may have heard the blogosphere described as an echo chamber. That’s a way to describe the effect I’m talking about. Metabloggers blog about blogging itself. About how to blog. About how to make money blogging. About how to bring traffic to your blog. The problem is, they’re not getting this to the people who really need it. Their audience seems to consist primarily of other metabloggers!
Imagine a bunch of professional golf instructors giving each other tips instead of teaching people how to play golf! Or a group of salespeople trying to sell to each other instead of customers. I think you get the idea. If that’s the kind of blogger you want to be (and don’t we all?), then you’ll find the following ten tips invaluable:
10 Tips for How to be like Other Metabloggers
- visit only the blogs of other metabloggers.
- comment only on other metabloggers’ blogs.
- never visit other kinds of blogs–especially those who might benefit from your brilliant blogging/make-money advice.
- Don’t participate in forums about anything except blogging.
- Keep looking for that magic bullet on how to get more traffic.
- Write about making money online, even though you haven’t, you aren’t, and you probably won’t.
- Put enough ads and widgets and crap on your blog so that it looks like Vegas. At night. On acid.
- Never offer any proof for your assertions: just throw out vague opinions without citing any facts.
- Never offer proof of your authority: don’t tell people how much money you’ve made online and don’t say how long you’ve been blogging. Never talk about how people pay you for your advice or work.
- Never interact with people locally–only do stuff online.
You Have Been Warned
If you follow my incredible advice, you will be like a great many of the other metabloggers out there. You will blend into the endless sea of other metabloggers with no experience and no authority. After only a year or even less, you will give up.
If you fail to do the above, well… I cannot be responsible for what might happen. You may end up reaching people who aren’t metabloggers: people who run businesses, people who are new to blogging, people involved in some other niche. These people might actually subscribe to your feed, click on your ads or, worst of all, they might want to pay you money for your advice or services. Goodness knows we don’t want that!
You have been warned.
Technorati Tags: metablog, metablogger, metablogging, how to blog, blog tip, blogging tips, blogging tip
5 Comments
Michael,
This post literally has me cracking up! The thing is that the majority of what I am reading here is the truth. I have seen so many metabloggers begat other metabloggers whom begat other metabloggers. And while not one myself, it always struck me as odd.
And even though I am not necesarilly a metablogger, I think I still would look pretty darn cute in that shiny robotic dress. GRRRRRRRRR!
Good post sir.
Bunk, LOL, your comment cracked me up. Thanks!
Hey, great article (what was it about?), please visit my site!
Just joking. I didn’t know there are so many metabloggers trying to make money telling each other how be make money online.
You used a wind-up toy to illustrate your post; my mental image of such activity is far less flattering.
LOL that was sarcastic yet true.
I read many other blogs though, from self-improvement to tech blogs and celebrity blogs. I am also a book worm and a science geek, a graphics nerd, a modest coder and a veteran desktop modder. Sooooo yeah, I get your point
Mohsin, you sound a lot like me. I figured a little “tongue-in-cheek” sarcasm would be a fun twist over “straight” advice.
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